


Shame

by NonBinaryDonut



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Acceptance and Love, Adult Education, Angst, Classical Fontcest, Differences between Human and Monster societies, Ecto-Genitalia, Ecto-Tongue, Explicit Descriptions of Sex and Genitals, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Gender Dysphoria, Gender Roles, Gentle Sex, Hurt and comfort, Incest, Internalized Homophobia, Internalized Transphobia, It-Pronouns, Linked Footnotes, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Man with a Vagina, Misgendering, Monster History, Neopronouns, Papyrus is 21, Papyrus learns History, Past Abuse, Porn with Feelings, Pre-Frisk Story, Pre-Underground Memories, Pre-any Run, Propaganda and War, Sans is 24, Self-Acceptance, Sex Toys, Sex and Shame and Insecurity, Sibling Incest portrayed positively, Skeleton Sex, Slurs, Social Dysphoria, Songfic, Soul Sex, Strong Language, They-Pronouns, Trans Male Character, Trans!Sans, Traumatic Experiences, Underground as LGBTQ+ Safe Space, coming-out, healthy conversations about sex, monster discrimination, monster hunting, safe sex, sex positivity, song interpretations, vaginal intercourse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:34:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27748348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NonBinaryDonut/pseuds/NonBinaryDonut
Summary: Papyrus learns about how growing up on the surface might have influenced his older brother more than he’d ever really thought about. OR: The fic where Papyrus finds a drawing at the garbage dump.POV alternating, but mostly Papyrus’. | Classical Fontcest, UT!Sans/UT!Papyrus | Please read the Summary for tag clarifications and further details. Thank you.
Relationships: Alphys & Papyrus (Undertale), Papyrus/Sans (Undertale)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 51





	1. Quiet Water

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, before you start, I wanted to say some important stuff!
> 
> First of all, a few clarifications for some relevant tags so you know what you are getting into:
> 
> “Pre-Underground Memories, Propaganda and War, Monster History, Monster Discrimination, Monster Hunting”  
> I have made up my own lore for this universe, this includes what happened before monsters lived underground, for example hunting and expulsion by the speciesist human society. I recognize that those might remind of real world discrimination, expulsion and ethnic cleansing, with are heavy topics.
> 
> Most important differences to original story:
> 
> \- Humans forced monsters Underground in different waves, not all at once.  
> There were three major waves. The first one was a test, the second one the largest and “official” one (installation of the Barrier), and the third one is known as “the last wave”.
> 
> \- Some monsters fled and still flee independently into the Underground.  
> The Ruins are not the only entrance. Any monster can enter without complications, but of course they can never leave after that. Those that still live on the surface do those under highly restrictive and cruel conditions, but this process is very arbitrary and dangerous.
> 
> \- W. D. Gaster never set foot in the Underground.  
> The Core was built by a small group of monster scientists instead. Gaster himself was an influential scientist on the surface and someday just vanished.
> 
> There might be more things that don’t fit with the original story, I’m also not that much into the fandom anymore as I used to, so I might actually have forgotten some important stuff. For the most part though, this story focuses on the brothers’ relationship, so I don’t think it’s that detrimental if something is wrong with the backstory. I did, however, create a timeline that I might share at some point.
> 
> “Sibling Incest portrayed positively”  
> This story will contain a (consensual and loving) romantic and sexual relationship between (classic) Sans/Papyrus who did not grow up together. Still, in this universe incest relationships of siblings are overall accepted among monster societies (not among human societies) and will be framed and described as generally positive and healthy. I know sibling incest is common in Fandom but still wanted to highlight that one might see it as glorification/abuse, especially transferring this message to real life. I acknowledge the ignorance of problematic aspects (for the sake of the pairing and plot) that can go into such relationships. I hereby warn you to stay away from this fic if this makes you uncomfortable.
> 
> “Explicit Descriptions of Sex and Genitals, Man with a Vagina, Internalized Transphobia, Social Dysphoria, Gender Dysphoria”  
> The trans male character, influenced by transphobia, will struggle with his identity, but it is less related to his body but more to human society and how he grew up in that mess they call gender roles. Regarding his body, he will refer to himself as a man with a vagina and while having sex there will be explicit references to his genitals; he has no intention of changing them. I understand that those explicit descriptions might make some (trans/ftm) people feel dysphoric, this is why I am mentioning it again.
> 
> “It-Pronouns, They-Pronouns, Neopronouns"  
> There will be side-characters in the story that use uncommon pronouns. Those featured in the game of course will keep their pronouns, but I used some less common ones for my OCs to try it out. Pronoun list:
> 
> he - him - his - himself  
> she - her - her - herself  
> they - them - their - themselves  
> it - its - its - itself  
> xe - xem - xyr - xemself  
> ze - zir - zir - zirself
> 
> I’m orienting myself on this list:  
> https://intercultural.uncg.edu/wp-content/uploads/Neopronouns-Explained-UNCG-Intercultural-Engagement.pdf
> 
> “Songfic, Song Interpretations”  
> This story will contain lore that will make it possible to interpret a song you might know that will come up later in the story. I may give out a list of all the hints and keywords I used at a later point after the chapter with the reveal.
> 
> “Linked Footnotes”  
> Later on, I might use linked footnotes in this fanfiction. Normal footnotes with numbers would include additional information (explanations, behind-the-scenes, character design links), notes marked with an “m” would link you to music/lyrics that I reference (which you can just ignore if you are not interested) - I promise I’ll use those sparingly though!
> 
> Feel free to leave feedback to the story or tell me if I should add/change something in the tags and/or the clarifications. THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING SOMETHING SO LONG IN ENGLISH, SO I HOPE IT IS BEARABLE - YOU CAN GIVE ME FEEDBACK ON THAT TOO. Thank you and enjoy. :)

It wasn't exactly something that Papyrus was able to name or label, it was a concept so ghostly that he quickly deemed it unable to be fully and thoroughly grasped. This didn't mean though that he wasn't trying to recognize; that thing that was lurking in the background of their conversations, in every little movement. Everything he was able to observe alarmed him and he desperately wished to understand.

All the happy moments could easily fade away into nothingness the moment he would take just one glance at his brother's face that always exhibited a grand big fake smile that made it hard to ever truly read him. Every little ounce of bone that could have shown an emotion was either hidden under cloth or stuffed away in it - he was drowning in it. And it was purely, painfully, so obviously intentional.

Papyrus could probably count the number of occasions he tried to strike up a calm, reasonable conversation about the topic at hand, and with every time he felt more guilty but also became increasingly worried. Sans would always answer with short sentences or downplay the situation without really addressing any concern; it meant that something was indeed very wrong and he wasn't just imagining it.

And so, months were sweeping by, everything going as usual, following the same pretend-game of happiness from morning to noon to evening to night. More than often, Papyrus let himself believe the sharade because it was the easy way to handle it - but he knew that somehow, it had to be resolved.

*

“WOWIE!!!”

Full of amazement Papyrus looked at the properly polished beast on four wheels that was proudly displayed in the middle of the castles' basement, and followed Undyne to take a better look. The whole minimalistic architecture together with the lighting put the focus clearly on the two-door white car in the centre that stood there like a bold statement and would draw even the most clueless monster closer.

“Pretty cool, right?” With a proud smile Undyne stood next to him, the shimmering aluminium reflecting both of their excited faces.

“I DIDN'T KNOW ASGORE EVEN OWNED A CAR!”

She nodded, “He really cares about that bad boy, although I guess he will always be more of a nature kind of guy and rather hang out in his garden.”

The image of driving on the surface with nothing but the endless horizon in his sight flashed up in Papyrus mind - the wind, the speed, the feeling of drowning in freedom, and his brother sitting next to him. Not in a car like this, of course, convertibles were a must-have for him in order to fulfill his dream, and this one didn't have that.

“SO, WHAT WAS IT I SHOULD HELP YOU WITH? THE CAR?” Curious, he slowly started walking around it in order to inspect, following the green stripe it had on each side with his gaze.

“Yeah. So the sad thing is, it's not safe to drive anymore. Apparently, most models would have some problems with the rear axle at some point. Asgore asked Alphys to fix it, but she needs some specific parts from the garbage dump and three people see more than two.”

“I UNDERSTAND.” One last view at the front side where the car looked like it's soft lamp-eyes were pleading for help - then he took in his signature pose, one hand on his chest, wishfully imagining his scarf dramatically floating in the air. Ready to help the royal scientist.

“THIS IS, OF COURSE, NO PROBLEM FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS!”

*

Sans knew a lot of people. Whenever he entered Grillby's, everyone's faces instantly lit up. He'd visit his favourite bar at least five times a day, order some ketchup with fries, tell the latest puns he came up with, and leave for work where he would spend his day making up even more and, occasionally, selling a hot dog or cat or other hot animals.

“You could keep the name but change the branch, selling some furry drawings. I'm sure people would buy that, especially if you'd do it”, someone on the bar jokingly said that day. What followed were a variety of first humerus but increasingly serious requests for some quality art from all the different tables.

“hold on a second, guys, i don't even have a pen right now.” Quickly he was given one and in the circle of his company he drew some really sketchy pair of dogs that deeply blushed while nuzzling their noses against each other. 

“(I don't know what I expected but although it's cute it looks somehow really inappropriate)”, Dogaressa wheezed loudly as she saw the result that Sans handed to her. For the rest, that piece of lines on a crumpled napkin settled it. If his mailbox wasn't filled enough already, a lot of Snowdin residents suddenly send him letters asking for a not safe for work but comedic art piece.

A few afternoons later, Papyrus found his brother actually working on the drawings - he double-checked a few times after he became witness of that situation - and he was as proud as a brother could be, and Sans looked really happy with his new occupation.

In order to support him, Papyrus bought him some drawing block and a few more pens to fulfill his visions. “This is not even worth my drawing skills”, his brother commented amused before turning to him, “but thank you.”

*

Sans and him hadn't grown up together, their lives had taken completely different paths due to the separation of their parents before Papyrus had even been born and due to the important but often overlooked fact that monsters didn't come down to the underground as one closed group at one specific time, but rather in "waves".

Initially, everything began in a small apartment in a human city, where Sans was born. But after the first wave, their mother Courier broke up with their father, leaving while already pregnant with Papyrus, to settle down in a monster town. Papyrus was born the day the barrier was installed (second wave) and monsters on the surface were then only tolerated and allowed to stay under certain "conditions", whatever they were.

There were a lot of memories missing, not enough to make sense of it, the details of his surroundings very fuzzy, had he just been some innocent pile of bones that was quickly overwhelmed by sudden changes. He didn’t understand the danger of the situation back then and he felt like he had the facts but not the experience, and trying to piece it together made his head ache. Regarding his mother Courier, of course he had some memories; her face, her singing voice, the times she would hold his hand firmly when they walked over the market of the small town.

Meanwhile, Sans had lived with Gaster who seemed to have been tolerated in scientific circles due to certain knowledge, but that is all he knew about his father, through the difficulty Sans had speaking out even his name implied what kind of man he must have been.

So somehow, both parts of the family were able to continue living like that, but the turmoil of the war led to the third wave 201X, concluding on his side with Courier's confirmed death and him being deported together with the small town he had lived in when he had only been four years old; the "journey" to the underground one he had been too paralized to comprehend. After some chaos, he was taken into an orphanage and raised there.

Sans, on the other hand, didn't come down in a conventional wave, but only two years ago, having lived on the surface for over 20 years with Gaster until he vanished, never to be seen again.

When Papyrus got the message that he had a surviving relative he rushed to the community center, and there he was, the sibling he didn't know actually existed, unsure on whether he had understood Courier's vague words about other family members correctly.

Maybe he had convinced himself over time that there wasn't more to it than moving out of the youth centre and starting his life in Snowdin, as Sans stopped talking about the past, not that he had given much of his account anyways, and it faded away in the fog of his own mind; him completely concentrating on the wonderful fact that they had each other now.

The loud TV startled Papyrus, tearing him out of his dream in the exact moment Mettaton announced some new late night show airing on fridays “with some of the hottest guests of the underground”. He quickly grabbed the remote to turn down the volume before noticing that he wasn't the only one in the living room.

There Sans lied next to him in the flickering light of the television, curled up like a ball, his engrained signature smile on, hugging some old cushion, hands deep in his pockets but visibly and tensely clinging to the fabric on the inside. He rarely wore different clothes, didn't even own more than three outfits and one of those was just a copy of his regular one in case Papyrus decided that it was really time to wash them - but one could clearly distinct them, especially since the main blue jacket's color slowly faded and the left pocket had not one but two holes that made it useless.

Even though he was sleeping or maybe exactly because of that reason one could see how restless he was; of course the older skeleton was known to be lazy and rarely leaving his bed if there was no need to be awake, but when Papyrus got the chance to see him like this, his sleep never looked like it was actually enjoyable.

It was probably best to not confront him directly about his feelings, Papyrus thought, and instead of demanding some answer he should just try to accommodate him in anything that seemed important one day at a time. Maybe, if he could make Sans feel better little by little, he would be able to open up himself, no pressure, and tell him what exactly was haunting him.

The older one whispered something unintelligible in his sleep before abruptly turning into the other direction, one leg kicking his brother in the process, parting him from his thoughts. Standing up to leave him space, he covered the other with a blanket before going to bed.

*

The water was dirty and cold as Papyrus let his feet sink in. From the disgusted look on Undynes face he was glad that his sense of smell was not as good as hers, by far. However, proud as a soldier could be, she followed him, wading through the water into the dark alley where the garbage dump was, while Alphys was in the middle of explaining more about their mission.

“-it's a sports car built 1963 with a so-called twin-cam engine. Produced in the United Kingdom, the construction was made possible through the collaboration of Lotus-”

Suddenly a loud bang interrupted her and pain spread on Papyrus' tibia as he hissed loudly before taking a step back. It was hard to see what exactly lay beneath the water, but he totally crashed into it.

“Are you okay?” Undyne hurried up beside him. “I THINK SO”, he nodded and touched the bone as if to check, but obviously that just hurt more.

“Piece of crap!” With a few quick movements, Undyne threw the thing that turned out to be a cooling box to the side where it wouldn't block the middle path anymore while Alphys was catching up to them. The way she was navigating through the trash, also already slightly scanning the area, was far more careful and also clearly showed that this wasn't her first time searching for items here. 

“PLEASE CONTINUE.”

Alphys needed a moment to realize it was addressed at her: “Oh! I-it's fine, it wasn't that- that important for the, uh, m-mission, anyway. I, um, also made s-some list with the parts so you can-can just go ahead s-searching.” She handed them both some paper with a very elaborate list that even showed drawings for clarification.

Both Undyne and him needed some time to read it while Alphys was already off starting (which was sad, he actually wanted to hear more about the car). They probably would need to spend more than a day looking for that stuff, no guarantee that it was actually there - but this might be the easiest and cheapest way.

Still feeling a bit numbness coming from his bone, Papyrus went towards the nearest dump where two bikes looked like they were violently hugging each other at the top in order to not fall down.

Starting in the middle, he inspected the stuff. It was a mixture of old monster furniture and human creations that he wasn't really familiar with. His gaze wandered off to some kind of sculpture - looking closer, he actually remembered it as something he had seen as a bonnet ornament on cars in magazine pictures - so he took it and stowed it into a pocket.

It wouldn't be the last time he saw something that he liked and decided to take with him, so over time he found himself collecting some of the trash for himself, only slowly finding stuff that was actually needed.

The search was long and detailed, the three of them barely speaking to each other since the noise of the waterfall would have swallowed their words. Only in breaks they would come together to compare their findings where Alphys would further sort out what was actually useful - unfortunately, at least half of what Undyne and Papyrus brought her didn't fit that category.

Returning to the same dump he had begun his quest on, Papyrus was tired of seeing the same garbage for two hours and decided to walk around it, being extra mindful of his steps as he left the main path, having to partly climb on and over things to advance - as his eyes caught something that wasn't slobbery and didn't look like it could have been there for a long time.

Pressed between trash and a wall, the crumbled piece of paper looked like someone had thrown it behind the collection of garbage not long ago, and, more importantly, Papyrus recognized the slightly expensive drawing paper.

Before even questioning his findings, just following pure curiosity, he pulled it out of the gap and opened it.

The revealed drawing in his hands, Papyrus blinked a few times, instantly knowing it was Sans’, being forced into a stop as his emotions were cluttered with honest surprise.

It wasn't his usual style from his comedic furry art. It was… raw. Intimate. Sincere.

Showing two familiar skeletons. 

They were… doing things to each other.

One of them had this wonderful smile...

The lines were so soft, gentle expressions - he felt dirty looking at it. 

Not because of the content itself, but because he felt like he intruded Sans privacy to a level one could only be ashamed about.

Not mentioning how his magic reacted to it.

“Papyrus, where are you!?”, a loud shout from Undyne that prompted him to put the drawing to the other things he kept for himself, without thinking about the piece of paper itself, but rather wondering about what it might mean.


	2. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus’ POV. Awkward feelings are being harbored, the past is thought of, interesting letters are received and a gemini outs himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pronoun help:  
> they - them - their - themselves
> 
> Little side note: While I enjoy the backstory I have constructed for this, there won't be any major underground events happening (no wars, and they won't go to the surface or anthying) - this story is more on a smaller scale, focussing on how Sans & Papyrus differ from each other, why, and how that influences their behaviour towards each other in platonic, romantic and sexual contexts. Just want to clarify that, because I noticed all their talks about the past could be understood as a build-up to something larger happening, which isn't the case. This FF will heavily focus on their relationship. :)
> 
> Btw, each chapter will consist of ~2,100 words.
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr where I might post character designs for this fic or in general fanart: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/nonbinary-donut

It was weird, entering the house at midnight, the moonlight following him in as if to encourage him to go inside - but also disturbing the colorful silence as if to alert the other one of his presence; ridiculous actually, since nothing specifically was bound to happen. Everything that was going on was in his head; the image still burned in his mind, feeling like the real world was slightly shifting, slightly off from what he remembered, and the guilt that added weight to his bones seemingly seduced him to clumsiness. He was still quiet, but also far to loud.

“hey, bro. your leg looks damaged, everything alright?”

Papyrus froze in the centre of the living room as the other appeared directly in front of him only seconds later, like a slap in the face; and all the possibilities rushed through his mind, excitement that he couldn't pin down rattling through his bones.

Anatomy practice. Sexual curiosity. Drawing practice. Need for sensual attention. Satire practice. Hitting a bad wave of the monthly mating cycle. Non-erotic feelings expressed aesthetically. Being single and horny as fuck. Cleaning one's mind of a dream by putting it on paper. Having fallen in-

He dared to look at him as if to proof to himself that nothing had changed between them. An unfocused “YEAH, UMM…” leaving his teeth, the other gestured towards the sofa. “c'mon, it looks really bad. sit down, i'll heal you.” He wanted to deny, but only then noticed the visible bruise on his bone that he hadn't seen all day due to it being underwater, so he decided to just go along.

Flinching under the sudden touch of magic he noticed that Sans stopped for a second as an reaction; he nodded in allowance.

The intent was pure. His expression was deeply focused on the act itself, the want to not cause him any more hurt was something he could naturally feel by being given recovery, and it soothed Papyrus, easing the weirdness he had felt when looking at Sans the first time. Now he tried it again, thankfully accepting the help, taking in the normality of this situation, sitting together on their usual spots.

“pap, i need to tell you something.” As his eyes met his, he had to control his thoughts to not spiral again into abyss. 

He wouldn’t, right? He wouldn’t-

“sorry, but i’ll stop with the drawing biz.” An apologetic smile in Papyrus’ direction, he let go of the bone that seems to have been cured with so much care that it feels more energetic then every other tired bone in his body.

The word sprouted out of his mouth: “WHY?” 

A heartbeat.

“have you seen my mailbox?”

Oh.

“i felt overwhelmed and begun just procrastinating instead of getting anything done. i even started skipping my regular work hours.” Instantly, Papyrus begun to feel bad again. Maybe he shouldn’t have labelled all of his actions of pain as a normal occurrence. He had failed to accommodate him in his happiness. By buying him drawing items he had just put more pressure onto him…

“now i want to get back on track with the hot dog stand, maybe resuming this as a hobby later, when i’m also… better prepared to draw… some of the stuff they want me to.”

The greater skeleton nodded sympathetically, trying not to unnecessarily wrap his head around the last statement and just being a good brother: “BE ASSURED, I WILL SUPPORT YOU, SANS."

*

The strategy of minimal effort was one that could be observed only through the motions Sans would make, his movements always seemingly restrained by an invisible force. Everything that wasn’t part of some elaborate tiny plan was deemed to not be done by him and he always looked like he didn’t give a fuck - but Papyrus knew that there was more behind every step he took, as if he carefully had to follow a routine or else he would be burned or bitten by fate.

The older one would always attest him that he was a cool brother, but he knew he strongly outdid him in that regard. This way of being, unbroken and still in a corner, maybe unwillingly appearing like the mysterious guy that had some big secret to hide behind that friendly face, that was what people admired, that was who they would crown with a description like “cool dude” - he was the one who received letters, gifts, smiles, laughs.

Sometimes, he was envious of that, but mostly when he was alone and only thought of the concept of it. Most of the time he could see how attention and “fame” weren’t the things that would truly touch his soul; the conversations Sans had in Grillby’s bar or in general with the people of Snowdin always lacked something that Papyrus would call warmth - not that they weren’t nice to his brother, they really, really liked him - but Sans seemed numb to any attempt to actually make a connection more meaningful than a few humorous innuendos and having a good talk about food.

Something was holding him back from opening up, and of course Papyrus knew the simple answer.

Fear. The fear of being recognized, reacted to, and rejected by.

The more defined, complex answer though was something unreachable.

What was it, what was the secret, what shouldn’t people know, what shouldn’t they react to and would it actually be reasonable to reject him for it, or was it a prison he had build in his head?

*

“I REALLY WISH THERE WERE MORE CARS UNDERGROUND… ARE EXHAUST GASES THE REASON WE DO NOT PRODUCE THEM?”, confidently wearing his protection goggles, he handed Alphys some weird-looking wrench and her voice echoed through her small repair station as she murmured an answer while lying under the car.

“W-well, that is not the problem. I have some ideas for hydrogen cars - basically zero emission vehicles - but I’d still need more people for actual development and we lack qualified workers for such positions, especially since our highest priority right now is the core which is already short-staffed.”

He noticed immediately that it was a topic she could confidently talk about, her words not drained by insecurity, but instead shining full of knowledge; not because she had the ability to show off, but because it was her element of expertise and passion. Something she normally rarely showcased in other contexts, but having the car and by extension her work so deeply intertwined with Undyne’s and his presence, it made for a interesting new dynamic where it was literally sensable how much she deserved to be the royal scientist.

“Humans had always kept control over scientific institutions on the surface… umm, s-sorry.”

He couldn’t quite place her apology, maybe didn’t give it enough thought. “WHY?”

“Oh, well… if it had been up to them, all monsters would have been stylists or hairdressers before the war.”

“...HAIRDRESSERS?” His first thought, most monsters not even having hair, was quickly overwritten by a realization.

“They didn’t like monsters, obviously, but our… ‘style’. So fittingly, those were the jobs deemed ‘appropriate’ for us and very common in human-dominated cities: monsters styling humans. Scientific occupations were only secretly pursued in midst monster societies, but it was still r-risky. In conclusion, not many monsters having scientific education put us into a disadvantage when arriving at the underground, obviously without electric infrastructure or anything the like, having to start from scratch. Navigating through the cavern by the light of crystals and the invention of portable heaters - flawed but useful - were…”

Suddenly, Alphys seemed to realize the wall of text she was giving out verbally and became aware of how she was in the spotlight of the situation, the mood shifting from one second to the other.

“...th-those were, uh, t-things that ha-happened.”

Nodding to himself, he let her carry on with her work and found an odd expression on Undynes' face. Blinking a bit to fast, then taking in a breath as if she was to scold Papyrus for something, her mouth quivering a bit, then changing to a softer approach as if she was to teach him something in the following sentence - but decided against it.

Papyrus would have initiated the conversation instead in order to clear things up, but- 

"U-Undyne, could you assist me d-down here?"

Her eyes wandered between the yellow monster and the tall skeleton for a few moments, before she bowed down in order to crawl under the car too. “Sure thing, Alphys.”

*

Still feeling guilty for putting Sans under his expectations by buying him expensive drawing items and also having invaded his privacy without his knowledge, Papyrus decided to make it his task to go through the stuff that was piling up inside his brothers mailbox. Of course he wouldn’t actually read the letters or open the packages he received; but sorting them by their sender was something he had done in the past and was explicitly allowed to. 

He knew this wasn’t a fun topic or would really cheer the other up, but at least he could make the tiring necessity a bit easier to bear, for example by separating bills, business mail or friend’s letters from junk mail or things he got send by some random admirer or prankster.

The first, radical and overdue measure was to actually empty the mailbox - Papyrus stuffed everything into a big bag and carried it over to their table in the living room where he would spread everything and subsequently sort his post into the piles “this looks important” and “i don’t know the sender”. Usually that sufficed.

Right in the middle of the whole thing, Papyrus nearly jumped and screamed as he hold a noble dark envelope in his hands and read the outside.

 _MTT TV Station, Hotland_  
_Interview Request for “Late Night Underground”_  
_Sans (the skeleton), Snowdin_

In this second, a new category was born, called “this precious post didn’t deserve to rot in your trashy mailbox, Sans”. Carefully he smoothed down the wrinkles of the paper and placed it away from all the other mail, on the sofa - which turned out to be a bad idea when his brother arrived a few minutes later and he didn’t react fast enough to keep him from throwing himself directly onto the masterpiece of an epistle, crumbling it again.

*

After handing Grillby the response letter (local establishments would often work as sort of post offices), Papyrus was on his way back home, but-

“Y’know, this place needs more of those h-h-hot guys that you want to just”, a drunken bunny murmured unprompted into their glass of wine, “step on you~” 

Sinking deeper into their seat, they took a big gulp of the red liquid and Papyrus didn’t actually know if this was the beginning of a conversation with him, but since he was the nearest person around and probably the only one who actually took note of their words, he decided to engage in it by settling on a place on the same table: “WELL, THAT DOES SOUND PAINFUL.”

A bit surprised, the bunny looked up, then scoffed when making out the skeleton through their slightly hazy view: “Pain is just what my horny ass needs~… of course, naïve dudes like you wouldn’t understand.” Apparently failing at whatever meaningful gesture they wanted to underline the message of desperate lust with, they put their glass back on the wooden board a bit too fierceful, it almost spilling over.

Quickly leaning forward - “I AM NOT NAÏVE!” - he saved their drink from the possible accident by grabbing it and gently placing it between them, before thinking a bit more about his answer, elaborating: “WELL OKAY, MAYBE A BIT, BUT THAT DOESN’T MAKE ME LESS GREAT.”

A small laugh as they pulled their drink back to themselves again. “Pff, virgin”, they whispered under their breath, playing with the stem, eyes half-closed and head lying on the table as if it was too heavy a burden.

“I AM ACTUALLY GEMINI!!”

“Papyrus, seriously-”

“AND I ALREADY HAVE ENJOYED THE PLEASURES OF SEXUAL INTERCOURSE.” Almost spitting wine across the table at that sentence, the bunny suddenly looked very sober. “ALTHOUGH I WOULD HAVE PREFERRED MY PARTNER NOT ONLY BEING GOOD IN BED BUT ALSO BEING GOOD IN GENERAL.” He was glad that he never had to see his ex again.

They still wore the same expression, frozen and in disbelief, just… blinking at him. A few seconds of this passed before they swallowed what was still in they mouth. Avoiding eye contact, they abruptly looked very distressed.

“Fuck. Here I thought I wasn’t the only one who never boned someone before.”

Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening trying to cheer them up.


	3. It’s Showtime!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans’ POV. At the TV studio, some monsters ask some questions, the moderator intervenes and the end has a reward in store.

When his brother had stood in front of him with that excited look in his eyes, practically breathing in the fucking _smell_ of the request for an interview, Sans just couldn’t have said “no” to him, and by extension, to Mettaton's show. For Papyrus’ sake, he pretended really hard to be interested (“REALLY?” - “yes, it sounds fun” - “OH MY GOD, WOWIE!! THIS IS GREAT!!?!”) and even send back a handwritten answer that the other one insisted to carry to some shop or bar in town that offered deliverings. 

Now he was here alone in a brightly lit room in front of some really fancy mirrors, sitting on a really tall stool, the bag of at least three makeup-artists up his nose, waiting for the show to begin. His brother, of course, had travelled with him to Hotland, but was enjoying a big studio tour, probably drooling over the requisites and asking every cameraman for an autograph. He decided to stay here to quietly brainstorm some jokes that he didn’t throw around just any day. In any case of doubt, a joke could maybe suffice as an answer to the interview questions from the planned call-in.

Letting his eyes glide over the innumerable names of shades from the greatest palette he had ever seen, then to the countless eyeliner pencils. At this point he was so bored by sitting there for almost an hour that he just grabbed one of them and checked his face in the reflection (the whole room sparkling back at him) and falling into some old pattern of emphasizing the edges of his skull by drawing - the attempts to look more tough than he actually was had reached its peak when he had been a teenager; basically he had tried out a lot and makeup had proven to be a good friend.

He was finished with the routine before he heard the footsteps on the floor outside, knocks followed. “who’s there?”, an answer of habit.

“...Alec”, the famous robotic voice actually replied.

“alec who?”

“Alec-tricity. Ain’t that a shocker, darling?” Accompanied by laughter, the door opened in a very exquisite fashion and Mettaton entered the room without one movement that didn’t show off how proud he felt in his form, posing in the doorframe. His brother followed the quadratic star, the brightest smile couldn’t even be interrupted by his usual annoyed look after a bad pun. He hold a little notebook under his arm, probably most of the pages signed by random people from the set, and looked at the robot next to him as if he was surreal.

“We’re live in half an hour, my assistant will pick you up before it starts. I’m sure the audience will love your great debut!” After another very fancy pose that looked anatomically undoable for any soul without such a body, both of them were left alone. Papyrus stepped closer, squinting while getting used to the twinkling equipment of the room, while Sans rotated the stool to look at him directly, their heights now actually matching.

“YOU LOOK GOOD!!” Right as the other one walked up to him, he evidently wanted to put his notebook in the right pocket of his pants, “READY FOR YOUR… UM”, he seemed to freeze for a moment in realization, then totally inconspicuously stuffed it away in the left one instead. Normally he wasn’t the man of mystery, making such a minor thing oddly weird. “what is it?”

“NOTHING. JUST…”, letting his gaze wander, Papyrus now examined him further. “HOLD ON A MINUTE.”

“what?”, he reacted to the distraction, recognizing that the other one was hiding something, but he himself hid things all the time; it didn’t seem right to ask him what this was about, especially since it came along as incredibly trivial. Papyrus was allowed to have secrets too, even if (and he kinda even found that presumption rude himself) he suspected them not to be as big as his.

“SANS, OH MY GOD!! REALLY, GOING ON AIR WITH _STAINS_ ON YOUR CLOTHES??!?”

Highly underprepared for any situation like that, the loud footsteps of the other one in his direction ringed like a small alarm in his head, bony hands suddenly on his jacket, presumably scratching over some leftover ketchup - he didn’t look directly, made an effort to lean back and further away as to not be to close to him. His soul, on the other hand, longingly clashing forward in his ribcage as if it was expecting a hug.

He should have just simply washed the hoodie, not having to deal with the shitshow of his jumpy magic that he fretfully managed to stop from marking his skull with an exposing blush.

*

Receiving a big thumbs-up from Papyrus that stood next to the camera monster made him smile as the director counted down, then, precisely the second a red light went on, Mettaton started his moderation, greeting the audience after the last commercial break, while he already sat on the couch next to him for the following part. The other one was announcing some new merch and he slowly realized that all the lighting made the room pretty hot pretty fast.

Finally, as the cameras brought him into the frame, that was his cue: “hi. i’m sans. sans the skeleton, sentry in snowdin and professional hot-dog-seller.” He tried to make it sound funny but still- introductions always made him feel like leaving the impression that he actually had his shit together in life. Which was not true.

A few meaningless pre-discussed lines were thrown between them like a game of ping pong, Mettaton explaining the next portion of the show where viewers could call to ask the guest of this week’s edition (he had been suggested by the audience in an online poll) “everything they ever wanted to know”. Papyrus, meanwhile, was literally chewing on his own fingers out of excitement - the reason he actually agreed to this.

“Our first caller! You are live!” 

The response wasn’t immediate, the whole scenery slightly stiffening in anticipation until it seemed like someone in the department had to turn up the volume of the call, making the shy voice audible: “oh......umm… hi…….. oh boi, i….. i didn’t expect to actually get through…….”

A furry monster with glasses that stood next to the camera pointed urgently on their watch. “Do you have any question for our guest?”

“...............................”

Apparently not.

“well, that was an easy one, thanks!”, said Sans to make himself useful by bridging some time but also gave a friendly wink as to not discourage Napstablook from participating again in the following week. He heard the staff whisper “Next!”, then a rustling sound, then in a tone that you could have even considered too polite: “Hello! I do have a joke and a question for our handsome attendee, if that suffices - So, why did the skeleton know it would rain?” 

Because the skeleton knew the joke already.

“-Because he was feeling it in his bones!” The soothing voice laughed in a way you could only find adorable. Sans could bet that their king was already scheduled as a future guest for exactly that reason; the ratings would have ratings on their own. “So, fittingly, here my question: Having bones, how does that feel? Do they get stuck- or rather, do objects sometimes get stuck between them in an aggravating manner?”

“haha, well, actually you are right. since i like to wear short pants, stuff gets stuck between my legs sometimes. one time my brother papyrus and i - we were running through some high grass (funny times) and just _simultaneously_ got stuck in some nasty plants, us both dropping down on the ground. i’m sure it looked hilarious from the outside.”

He felt like maybe this could be more fun than he had anticipated, swimming a bit in a comfortable atmosphere of attention.

“Hey!!”, two far too loud voices squeaked through the studio and didn’t wait for an answer, “so, like, if we were to write some story - an EROTIC STORY that involves some SKELETON ACTION - like, they'd probably do this thing - KNOTTING - and, like, how does that work??”

And there his fun value was decreasing again.

For a moment he just considered laughing it off or making a pun like it was his original plan, maybe making himself forget this situation afterwards by not giving it enough attention. Still, he somehow thought it would look too defensive, reminded that it was a general question, not a personal one, and dogging it might make the situation actually more awkward than just giving an honest answer - so he just went for it fast before anything else could happen.

“well, uh, ‘s not that common”, he started calmly but still trying to avoid looking directly at Papyrus (and the camera) as to not get anxious, “actually, ‘s more of a thing for long-time partners, since, y’know, the goal is breeding, and because it can also take multiple hours it should be properly and consensually planned beforehand.” Actually nailing a sentence that he could imagine some educated medic saying, he got a little bit more confident in himself and was bold enough to look at least in Mettaton’s direction. He nodded, looking interested but also surprised about the level of seriousness Sans brought in. 

He actually didn’t want to say more, but felt like he needed to add on out of completeness: “but this is just a special event and not the only way to achieve pregnancy, therefore one should always take precautions-”

“Okay, but like, when YOU do the thing and - FORM YOUR MAGICAL-”

It didn’t take a fraction of a second from the moment he was caught off guard by the pictures in his head and the moment he picked up where he left off, drawing the line here and planning some “knot your business” joke, but the robot was faster and harshly cut off anything that could have come after that: _“I think that is enough.”_

Sans noticed the minor gesture he made with his hand, a signal to the team - the connection instantly broke off, some happy music following, just skipping to the next moderation point like it was nothing. So he himself just smiled along to the man next to him that knew what he was doing.

*

Half of the company was already gone home, Mettaton guided Papyrus and him away from the studio to the MTT-hotel where they would spend the night before travelling back. The robot made their stay free of charge, and who would let such an opportunity go to waste?

While snacking at the extensive buffet of the contiguous restaurant, they still exchanged some phrases while a familiar piano play hovered in the air.

“so, what are your favourite shows? except your own, that is.”

“Hah! Good call. If I had to settle for a second - I really enjoy watching ballet.”

Ballet. Ballet?

 _Ballet_. Another joke from the universe to make _her name_ the same as a sport.

Mettaton changed the topic as he didn't answer: “Darling, I just wanted to say sorry for that last question, it still bothers me. At first I thought it would be funny, then educational, but then it just got intrusive - which I do not tolerate. I hope you still enjoyed the show.” He didn’t expect such a genuine goodbye from a celebrity that could easily not have given a shit, but he felt compelled to downplay the event.

“of course i did!”, it wasn’t even that big of a lie, counting the euphoria of his brother which unintentionally rubbed off on him a bit, “and don’t worry about me, i would have joked it away otherwise, no biggie.”

“...hm, I understand. Well... to be honest- I may be a bit preoccupied with questions of that matter. After I inhabited my new form, people just kept asking similar things, which felt really pushy. I might have projected my feelings a bit onto you.”

He answered slowly to the confession, trying not to think too hard about how much both of them were probably able to relate to each other: “um... ‘s fine, jumping in was really considerate of you.”

He smiled.

*

“um, what?” The younger skeleton looked like he was going to implode from just staring at him, his skull not having the capacity to actually express the amount of joy his mood was suggesting.

“YOU DID SUCH A GREAT JOB, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!”, the other one bursted out before starting a hug attack on him that almost made him fall over backwards if the other bones hadn’t catched him.

Finally, yearning for closeness, he allowed himself to lay his arms around the large torso of Papyrus, not able to reach completely around him and instead resting his arms on his side. He took the liberty to remain, to savour, his soul becoming warmer, a feeling of security spreading through his bones. Exhausted, he playfully let himself sink in his brothers hands that caressed his back lovingly for a moment, before picking him up from the ground like it was nothing.

Opening his eye sockets that he didn’t realize he had closed, he tiredly looked down at him, his extremities just uselessly hanging down in the air.

“LOOK AT YOU, YOU CUTE LITTLE COOKIE…”

Oh fuck. He would never be ready for Papyrus’ overboarding affection, would he?

“I’D SAY YOUR BEAUTY SLEEP NOW IS WELL-DESERVED.”

A light blue clinging to his cheeks (it didn’t matter, the lights were dimmed, no problem), he let himself be laid down in the bed and tucked in. No kisses, not yet. Kisses were something he only received in his dreams.


End file.
